Money...

So, I always say, "Money is a necessary thing because society lays such store in it. But, all I want from life is to have what I need when I need it and have some of the things I want." I have come to find that when there is no funds...there is no fun. That's just the way life is. I am desperate these days. I have no one to talk to about it, so I guess it is just as well that no one is expected to read this blah, blah, blah. I suppose this will be my place where I can voice my deep sadness and my distress. I try to be positive in everything I do, but lately, I seem to smile when all I want to do is step off this big ole rotating ball o' dirt and water, we call earth. Can't do it though. I have never been much good at quitting anything. So, as much as I hate to do it, I suppose I am here to stay. I am not really thrilled about it at this moment, but as with every other distressing time in my life, this too shall pass (I hope). I love living, but I don't much care for my life at this moment. I pray and cry and beg for some help. Yet, it is deeper and deeper into the abyss I fall. Free falling, actually. How is it that a social worker finds and connects so many people with resources to enrich their lives cannot find enrichment in her own? All the folks I assist don't know that most of the financial resources I find them are the same ones I need for myself. I cant ask for help. I am the getter of those things. I am not the recipient. I am a professional in this area. I can't risk my peers knowing that I am in a financial hole that is so large a bobcat couldn't dig me out. I feel like I am drowning and can't catch my breath, being pulled further and further down under the water where I will never find the light of day again. I want to scream "HELP ME!!" But instead, I smile and joke and try to be cheerful so that I don't bring down those I care about or those I serve. I am trapped.

Get out of your own way...

In this, my maden voyage into the world of blog, I would like to share some thoughts that were written by another. I found them while preforming my duties as an intern at Keeler Women's Center. It is written anonymously, so I cannot give credit to the author. I can, however, share the wisdoms with my readers.


Be careful what you ask for, you just might get it.
Your words, your dreams, and your thoughts have power to creat conditions in your life.
What you speak about, you can bring about. If you keep saying you hate your job, you may lose your job.
If you keep saying you cant stand your body, your body might become sick or lose bodily functioning.
If you constantly say you can't stand your car, your car could become disabled or even be stolen.
If you continuously worry about being broke, you might find that you stay broke for far longer than you ever thought.
If you keep saying that you can't trust that certian guy or gal, you will always discover someone in your life who will betray and/or hurt you.
If you keep saying you can't find a job, you will remain unemployed.
If you keep saying you can't find love, your very thoughts will attract experiences that will confirm those beliefs.
Turn you thoughts and conversations around to be more positive and packed with faith, hope, love, and action.
Don't be afraid to believe that you can have that which you desire and deserve.
Watch your "thoughts," for they become words.
Watch your "words," for they become actions.
Watch your "actions," for they become habits.
Watch your "habits," for they become character.
Watch your "character," for it becomes your destiny.
GET OUT OF YOUR OWN WAY!!!